Got tickets to the opening night of The Nutcracker with Boston Ballet for Emma and myself. Had hoped to get tickets for the final performance of Giselle this afternoon, too, but no luck. It will be her first ballet. She's excited. I saw Susan and she said that she and Emma would have to go out to get her a dress to wear for the occasion. Also, yesterday, on his second try, Benny passed his obedience exam that was part of the agreement with the building board for him remaining here, not that they would have ripped a dog away from a little kid after ten months. I hope to see Emma today. We did not see each other all of last week, save when she knocked on my door on Friday to give me a hug. I think she has been withdrawing in general lately, which is not good. It's not awful. Ups and downs. A dip. Just a reality of life. So I am going to try and (gently) get her to bring herself back out a bit more again. I don't mean with me. It doesn't have to be with me. I just love Emma so much and I want her to be well.
E: I don't want to go to dorothy's I'm sad and I want to sleep
C: What's wrong, bud? What are you sad about? I'm here if you want anything.
E: I don't know man I just found out my puppa has stomach cancer and Anthony is gone and my hair sucks
C: Hey, that's tough. But try to keep perspective.
C: You'll adjust with Anthony. Give it a little time.
C: Your hair looks great (even if you don't think so yet) and you are a beautiful young woman, always, who can make every kind of haircut look great.
C: I'm sorry about your grandfather. But you still have time with him. Make that time count. And we never know how medicine will play out. Learning about a diagnosis is scary. But again, try to use perspective.
C: Tell Anthony you miss him. I'm sure he misses you. Give him a call. Often, Emma, distance is as big as we make or don't make it.
C: Lastly, I love you very much and am always here for you. This is a lot to have going on at once. Don't forget you can talk to people. Your mom. Me. You can talk to your therapist again. Anthony. Dorothy. Don't bottle things up.
E: I'm sorry
C: I'm not criticizing you. You've done nothing wrong.
C: And Benny passed. That's good.
C: His exam. Not from this world.
E: I miss them
C: I understand, buddy. But Dorothy is here, just as she always was, and nothing has changed. Make the effort to see her. Take the T to South Boston. Invite her to the North End. Call Anthony. Or FaceTime. Tell him how you feel. Don't let sadness cause you to withdraw, okay? Sadness can compound sadness that way. And hey--I miss you!