Stairs shame; stairs redemption

Thursday 5/21/26

My effort and performance in running stairs wasn't where it should have been last week and the start of this one. Over the former, I ran only twelve circuits of stairs in the Bunker Hill Monument, and those were all in one day (last Thursday). I didn't run stairs anywhere else. Nothing on Monday either, so on Tuesday I went out to run the stairs at City Hall.

You shouldn't ever take stairs and how you'll fare with them for granted. It's a good life lesson and reminder, should you need one. They can always go a way you don't expect them to. Each day is different. The same as I don't assume another day of not drinking. It has to happen--you can't just expect that it necessarily will, or is even likelier, because of what happened the time or day before or how you think it should go.

On this Tuesday, I had one of my worst days of stair running in years. I ran up and down fifteen times, which may have been a couple more, but my focus also wasn't where it should have been and I kept forgetting the number I was on. My head wasn't right. I was hurting and had to take a break. After only 1500 stairs.

When was the last time something like this happened? I don't know. It has been a while. I guess maybe after a winter when the Monument had been closed for weeks and I wasn't running stairs anywhere else--which would take us back to 2018 or so--and I first got in there again, basically starting all over. That used to happen--you'd lose January and February, and pre-COVID I confined my stair-running to the Monument for some reason, like I couldn't also run stairs somewhere else just as easily. Rather dumb.

Anyway, I was hurting. Tuesday was the hottest May 19 we've had here going back a century. Temperatures reached 97, which doesn't mean I was out there at exactly then, just that it was hot throughout the day. The sweat was as if I'd done twelve circuits in the Monument or more.

You become aware of things like this. What your clothes become like and look like when you do these workouts. My right shorts leg gets wetter before the left, for instance. They'll maybe be uneven when I finish in the Monument. After a certain number of circuits, they're both soaked all the way through. Same as if you'd sunk them in the tub. Then there's this sweat on top of the sweat. Your shorts are saturated, but then there will be these visible sweat streaks overlaid on the wetness, which is a curious phenomenon. Stairs are really an amazing workout. A workout like no other. I'm may be, but I think that's true regardless.

That's how drenched I was on Tuesday. My will was week. I felt like I was being acted upon and couldn't act on anything myself. It was deplorable. I was. If there was a stair version of going gently, passively, weakly, into that good night, then this was it. I don't like letting myself down. I feel like it's as though everyone else, or anyone else, only lets me down or could, but I shouldn't ever be someone who lets himself down.

I sat on that marble island at the base of the stairs for a good while, and when I resumed, I only made five more trips up and down and these weren't easy either. Then I left. 2000 stairs. With a break.

A woeful performance.

I figured there was a good chance the Monument would be closed yesterday because of the heat (seems like it was just recently it was closing because of the snow), but even if it was going to be open, the City Hall stairs took priority because of my dismal showing the day before, as though this were a personal battle, which, of course, it is.

I went out there with a big number in mind--10,000 stairs, but that doesn't mean that's what happens. You're all gung-ho and rah rah rah in your head, but that doesn't necessarily translate into the actual doing. Sometimes, but like I said, each day is different, and you don't know until you're having at it. Games within the games.

I ran up and down the stairs thirty times, taking them two-at-a-time, as is how I usually handle the City Hall stairs now, and that was a challenge, but at least it was respectable. A woman walking past me had said, "God bless you," presumably because of the weather. That kind of scene.

I don't know what my deal is and why these struggles. Am I simply unaccustomed to the warmer weather and that'll be remedied with exposure and acclimatization? I've been out on these stairs hundreds of times in the heat. The hottest, most humid days of July. I tend to think of the Monument stairs as more difficult. They are, too, as I've said, the perfect stairs. The amount, the depth of them.

I'm not sure, but I could have this wrong regarding difficulty. I recall a day last year in the heat/humidity when I barely was able to do thirty trips up and down at City Hall. I was in what was close to mid-season form, too, so far as these matters go. In the Monument, you're sheltered. It's cooler than it is outside in the summer. That doesn't mean it's like being in air conditioning. But that heat isn't on your skin. You don't feel all...roast-y.

Whereas, at City Hall, it's like you're a flame. If you had to guess, you'd say your core temperature is higher. You feel as if you'd be hot to the touch. It's a bit like being the Heat Miser without the relish/delight. So it could be that City Hall stairs in the heat are harder than Monument stairs. A quirk of the seasonal dispensation.

Those thirty times up and down at City Hall correspond to five Monument circuits in terms of total number of stairs. After doing these, I once again sat on the marble island. A puddle of sweat formed at my feet shortly thereafter from all of it dripping off of me. Stopping to rest wasn't ideal, but I was going to try to chip away--that is, add on in bits and pieces.

This isn't how it's supposed to go. I was still concerned that something was wrong with me or that I'd gotten worse, which I can't afford to do. I need to be getting better, especially at this stage of my life, if I'm going to do well later on and not be at the mercy of these stairs and unable to do them as I wish to or would be close to being able to.

But stairs are a bit like goals in hockey. They don't ask you how you scored them, but how many. I mean, for now. This is something about sports that will probably be ruined, too, and guys will be dinged for scoring their goals in tight rather than off of shots from further out or some nonsense.

You can grind. That's a will thing in part. I got up and did another 1000 stairs, then took another break. That took me to 4000. I did the same thing to 5000, then 6000, then 7000, then another 500. All two-at-a-time, five breaks in total. Then I headed back, drenched, and stuck my head in a fountain at a park, which did nothing to cool me off. You're so damn hot.

I drank a couple liters of lemon water and waited for the sweat to stop while sitting in the bathroom in the dark. Then I was okay. 7500 stairs is a pretty decent number, but 10,000 would be better, and you're so close.

In the Monument, I count circuits, whereas at City Hall it's total stairs. Biggish round numbers are like goals you shoot for with these things. When you get close to a biggish round number, you feel like you should go for it.

So I changed my shirt and shorts, and went back out to City Hall. I ran 2500 stairs this time without a break, again two-at-a-time, to get the total to 10,000. In terms of total number of stairs, that's like sixteen Monument circuits. I came home a different way and dunked my head in one of those shooting water spurts in the Rose Kennedy Greenway, but again, it didn't even feel cold to my skin.

This will seem totally obvious to anyone else, but I must say that it made quite a difference having had something to drink and changing my clothes. I'll be honest--it felt like cheating. I'm very Puritanical when it comes to my work ethic. I believe in deprivations. I'm savagely hardcore and old school this way. Older than school.

It's just how I am, whereas almost everyone else is the opposite. People, for instance, want to work with people who don't hold them accountable. If I'm going to work with someone, I expect them to be good at their job and try hard. No cut corners. Striving, zero excuses. "On." Ultra-on. Not to my extent, but their version of this.

The change and hydrate thing is less doable with the Monument, being as it's a mile-and-a-half away.

A few hours later, I thought about going to the Monument. I felt fine and like I could easily have done five circuits there, or ten if I wished, and maybe I should have that kind of wild all-timer of a stair-running day. That would be impressive, right? 10,000 stairs at City Hall and then another 3000 or 6000 in the Monument?

I checked the website, though, which confirmed what I expected to see, that the Monument was closed for the day because of the heat, which made the final choice for me, but I'll be keeping this challenge in mind as something I can try and achieve.

It'd been a while since I'd done 10,000 stairs in a day at City Hall. Maybe not all of last year. My record there is 20,000. Those were done one-at-a-time. That's basically your day when you're doing that many. It'll be cooler today and I need to get back on the ball Monument-wise.