Why the Red Sox should stay the hell away from Mike Trout, the only way these Red Sox can win, Bruce Cassidy sitting pretty, two hard to believe in NBA teams but someone's gotta advance

Thursday 5/14/26

The Red Sox picked up a rare Fenway Park win last night, beating the Phillies 3-1. This seems to be the only way these Sox can prevail: hold the opponent to next to nothing or shut them out, and scratch across 1, 2, 3 runs. Maybe get a homer--like they did from Trevor Story in this ballgame--but not usually.

Worth mentioning from the historical standpoint per the Sox' series-opening loss on Tuesday: their first nine batters were retired on only 16 pitches. Who knows how often that's been accomplished in baseball history, Greg Maddux may have done it, and it would have been more common in the earliest days of the game, but it's exceedingly unlikely now. What it suggests to me is a team that's checked out. How do you not stop what you're doing after the very fast first inning and make sure you see some pitches? But then after two such innings, you're still doing the same thing?

Would have lost you more money if I was your betting advisor regarding the Cavs and the Pistons. As I said, I don't believe in Detroit at all, but it's hard to believe in a James Harden playoff team, too. A non-belief off, like I intimated. The Cavs are in the driver's seat now after taking Game 5 in Detroit last night. Can these Pistons win two in a row? Are we going to have a Cavs-Knicks Eastern Conference Final?

I have gotten the Avalanche right though rather consistently. They fell behind 3-0 early last night, but I didn't think the game was by any means over, and they came all the way back to force OT and won it there and advanced to the Western Conference Final where I expect they'll eventually play Vegas.

The Leafs fired Berube. Bruce Cassidy will be the coach in highest demand I suspect for both Toronto and Edmonton. I'm not sure how well he'd mix with a soft Leafs team. Edmonton could be the best fit and what McDavid needs so far as his Stanley Cup aspirations go. Cassidy gets the ship going in the right direction. Then he gets the bum's rush out of town because he's "mean" and this is a soft world, with even the locker room not exempt from the reach of that softness, but I can see him winning at least one more Cup.

I was in and out yesterday as I'm just trying to keep my head down and work in order to remain alive, but the few times I did look up I saw items speculating about Mike Trout coming to Boston. First off, Trout is a loser who likes losing in the same familiar spot. He can veto any trade and why would he wish to come to Boston and lose when he likes to lose where he is in California? Secondly, even if he wanted to be moved, trust me, you want nothing to do with this player. Mike Trout is the most overrated player in the history of modern sports. He was never very good. When he was "great" he wasn't that good.

Why don't you go look at what he led the league in. Why don't you go look at his batting average, his homer and RBI totals. His reputation is wholly a product of modern analytics, which will fall out of vogue at some point, replaced by something else. He walked a bunch. If there's anyone left who actually thinks and takes the trouble to look at the numbers, then in twenty, thirty years time, those people will be thoroughly perplexed how this guy was talked about like he was.

I don't think they'll even know how he was talked about, though, because Trout is utterly forgettable. He won't be remembered any more than Harold Baines, and probably less, because people do talk about Baines, even if that's just in the "How is that guy in the Hall" sense (for the record: I think Baines deserves his place in Cooperstown).

There won't be a single memorable thing about Trout. What? His WAR? His OPS+? He's long been out of shape, is the definition of lumbering, and he's been mostly useless for years now. This is a losing player who was never that good who doesn't care and is at the end. You want nothing to do with him. Believe me.

The other night, I saw him dive for a ball in the outfield that he didn't get within five feet of. He's always been a poor outfielder, in part because he's almost always been out of shape, but this was a guy going through the motions, trying to look good, feel good, maybe, I don't know, and not playing the position as if wins and losses actually matter. So damn comfortable where he's at as "the guy" and one indulging himself. That this player with the Hack Wilson physique and at that age is a center fielder here in 2026 speaks to entitlement, ignorance, and just how willing the clueless Angels, who have no interest in competing, are in enabling Trout in whatever he wants.

He's as one-dimensional as they come now in a league in which hardly anyone has two components to their game. A league of single dimensionality. Trout's dimension is the lumbering, can-get-hurt-with-any-swing, at-the-end would-be slugger/solo home run hitter in 9-4 games. Irrelevant player, and what will ultimately wash away as an irrelevant career.

And because there are people who just say things without ever thinking, and are perhaps in some frenzy if they've seen these words from someone who has actually thought and actually knows, I'll spell this out. If you're one of the all-time best hitters in baseball, don't you think you should lead the league many times in the big categories?

You know how many times combined that Mike Trout has led the league in batting average, homers, and RBI? Once. He has an RBI title from way back. He's never even led the AL in homers. But he's amazing, right? You wouldn't think that from watching him. You'd only think it because you didn't think and thought you were supposed to think it. Captain Ineffectual. Reputationally the product of very stupid, unthinking times, in which people can't even tell what anything is, so they say what they think they're supposed to, better yet if there's a single word or stat or phrase they can use every time to convey what they think means something of grand significance.