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Trauma, disabused, fire, every day, tufts, car in need of a jump, lines of attempted defiance, gendering, therapy, scantily clad, romance, bitten

Wednesday 11/13/24

People liberally apply the word "trauma" with a casualness that suggests they've never known real trauma at all. If they had, they'd have more respect for the word and what it signifies. They'd never throw it out there like fistfuls of bread crumbs.


Many people hate to be disabused of what they want to believe, no matter how false it is. Why? There are so many wonderful things that are true which you can know. They can add immeasurably to your life. They're waiting for you to go to them, find them, learn them, know them.


Isn't that better than clinging to things that are not that way, or clinging to them--often while cursing the messenger--after having been disabused of those notions?


Why do so many women post photos on Instagram--and often exclusively--of their mid-teen daughters in bikinis and suggestive poses? It's horrifying. These photos get a lot of comments, and I made the mistake of clicking on a few of those comment chains, hoping, I guess, that people were like, "What is wrong with you? Take this down."


There were a few comments like that--they'd read, "Why?" and say little, if anything, more--but the majority were from men and especially older men. Crazy looking guys with wild, white hair--the kind of hair that has tufts.


I don't understand what people are thinking with the choices they make. I mean, I do understand. You get what I'm saying. For instance, the seemingly millions of women who post photos on Instagram of themselves that are just sort of these soft core shots.


What are you doing? Why are you doing that? These drooling losers hitting that like button does something for you? What is that thing it does? Does that seriously feed your...what? Sense of self? Feelings of accomplishment? Does it make you feel good?


If you could essentially be anyone so far as someone else or others are concerned, then it doesn't matter that it's you and no one is liking you for you.


That shouldn't be something that seriously makes you feel good. If that's what's doing it, I feel like you're in a bad place. Wholeness doesn't happen in that place. It's just people regarding you like you are one of any of a million of objects with holes, which is how these men, if you want to call them that, are thinking, if you want to call that thinking.


And these guys, man. Holy dregs. How many rocks must there be in the world for all of these guys to come out from under them?


Am I the only person in the world in November 2024 who knows how "everyday" and "every day" work or even that there are both things? Because it feels that way.


People at magazines don't know, at newspapers, book publishers don't know, so-called writers don't know, senators, presidents of museums don't know, people with multiple degrees don't know, writing professors don't know. And if they don't know, who is going to know? I am unconvinced that anyone else knows. I think it's possible that everyone thinks it's "everyday" and that's all there is.


What does anyone know?


I saw this post from a person: "Someone could light him on fire and I'd still say they did nothing wrong."


Hmmm.


And some people really can't tell why things go the way they do and certain outcomes are produced? It's because other people are so horrible? It's so unfair? It's because of cheating? (They weren't talking about Trump, incidentally.)


You can't see why people wouldn't want to be governed by a party filled with people like that or that they associate with that attitude? Is that really so perplexing?


Pick whatever name you wish from the horrible people who turn up in these pages and it'd be just as wrong to be okay with them being lit on fire as it would be the best person who's ever lived.


This is very simple. Or it should be.


You ultimately answer to yourself. I've said this repeatedly and it's worth saying again. You answer to your morals, to the person you want to be.


Girls versus boys was supposed to end in kindergarten.


These lonely, anger-filled, broken women doing rah-rah girl-power all day and night in their social media feeds. They don't even know the people with whom they're doing it. This simulated community swallows their souls.


They think they're in this sisterhood, but they're alone and miserable. And this is not a way to become less alone and less miserable. I'm not talking about getting a boyfriend or a girlfriend, as in, "That's what you need!"


A lonely, miserable, angry person is a lonely, miserable, angry person unto themselves. Company or lack of it doesn't matter because of what they are or what they became. What they turned themselves into.


I'm not defending men. I'm not defending anyone. But I'm looking at the world and I'm seeing so little good and substance and sanity out there in people.


People act so tough on their social media, with all of these boasts and defiant lines, but they're the weakest people and it's all a lie. The attempted lines of tough-person defiance are cringe-inducing, too.


You can tell they don't even know what toughness is. It's very awkward. I'm embarrassed for them, save that these millions and millions of people who are this way make the world worse every day. (See how I did that there? Two words.)


I've never respected anyone who didn't give me reason to. I would never respect someone automatically. I wouldn't be rude to them. I'd be polite, friendly, and kind. But this idea that people think they're owed respect makes me think, Why? I feel like respect is a big thing. Big things get earned.


Is it strange that people who bleat on and on about being a feminist are trying to mock Elon Musk by referring to him as Elonia and as a girl or a woman?


I would say it's not strange, because of how people really are. That is, it's not surprising. Rarely do they honestly care about anything they purport to care about. They are doing that purporting for other reasons. Not out of their conviction. True belief. For justice or equality.


Most people no longer have an ability to care about anything. Everything's on a surface level as if no other levels exist. That's how we experience and partake of the world now. Exclusive surface. The surface to the exclusion of all else, such that people have no clue there is anything else.


Ironically, many of the people taking this tack are also people who, if someone they liked or pretend to like was misgendered, would welcome the literal execution of the person who did that misgendering.


And that's really how human life is now. No one honestly cares about anything usually beyond themselves. Attention. Being lied to. Lying to themselves. That's what they're invested in. Making a buck off this kind of thing if they can.


I saw where this therapist said that everyone should ask their therapist--correction; the implication was that every decent person, meaning, every liberal--who they voted for so that their values align. This therapist was obviously trying to poach. I mean, what a bottom feeder.


People loved seeing this. Imagine being so simple that you think someone is wicked because of a vote for the other party. And someone who voted for your party is automatically good.


I know people are stupid, but how can you be that stupid? You can't think of anyone who is a good person you know who didn't vote as you did? I almost feel bad for these people. Have you never experienced kindness? Did you experience it and not know that's what it was?


You left the lights on in your car. You come back out of wherever you were at later and realize the situation. It's cold, turning dark. The parking lot has emptied out. Some guy sees you. Older guy. Pulls up. This isn't really weather for him. No jacket. He's very friendly to you. Has some cables in his trunk. Gives you a jump. Makes sure you're on your way. You pull out of the parking lot and turn in one direction, he follows from behind and turns the other, and honks his horn.


I've described something that is no different, really, than something we've all experienced. You can change the variety of example. Now, you don't think there's a chance that guy didn't vote the way you might have voted? Whatever that may be? So he's evil? He has no values?


You probably wouldn't think that, though, even if you were otherwise inclined to think in this manner, if you happened to have this experience and were made aware of other bits of information. Then again, people are so intent on being hateful, that many in this situation taking to social media to try and put down this other person, showing a complete lack of gratitude for the help in a tricky spot.


But again: Is this not very basic and ordinary? Do you think it could only be someone who voted as you did as the other person in this scenario?


This therapist was herself crazy, which is often the case with therapists. And the idea that someone is going to know know the intricacies of the human condition and have all of this specific insight from person to person because they got a piece of paper at a school is mind-blowing to me. It doesn't work that way.


But I think more than anything it's the arrogance, the temerity, to think you have any right to that information. You want to know if they had sex last night, too? What their diet consists of? Can't have a meat-eater. Where does it end? There's privacy. And you do have to respect people's privacy.


Judge people in work-related matters on how they do their job and how well they do it.


So many people who reference their cats in their bios jumped into the discussion, saying they had this list of things--demands, really--they were going to put to their therapist, a fucked up game of twenty questions, with many saying that's how they've always done it.


You often see people posting comments that their therapists have said to them. And these comments are so inappropriate to me. It's obviously just the therapist telling that person what they want to hear. And about subjects that aren't therapy-worthy subjects. The pettiest shit. You spent the hour on that?


I realized what people do: They are paying someone to echo what they're saying. They're hand-selecting a professional echoer. But the act of the echoing is ideologically bolstered--and vocationally bolstered--by that term "therapy," like they're committed to awareness and growth.


I'm sure some people are. Not most, though. But they're able to tell themselves they're doing the work, even though they aren't. They're doing more of the same thing they always do and that they do on social media, but it's dressed up and touted as this other thing.


That you think people should give you their personal information is nuts. And this idea of "I have to make sure our values align" is the biggest crock of bullshit.


That's not what anyone is doing, and if you're that stupid to think blue equals good and red equals bad, then you are sufficiently dumb that you are a danger to the human experiment, never mind the American democratic one.


Romance is about wonder. Or its predicated on wonder. I mean romance in the sense of being a romantic, which isn't just a love or relationship thing, or even necessarily primarily one. Romance is a questing spirit. Openness to that which may be amazing. Taking chances, too. Looking where one might not have otherwise look or where what everyone else is doing suggests you have to look if you look at all. But you can't have romance without curiosity.


And like I said above, we have no real interest in anyone but ourselves. The irony being that were this not so, we could get to know others who would amplify who we are. I feel like people miss opportunities all the time for romance and growth and the things that would make them richer as a person, and happier as a person, and more fulfilled as a person, because of their blinders which lock their gaze solely on themselves.


You know the expression, "Blah blah blah could bite them on the ass, and they wouldn't know it"?


It's like that. There are so many people out there who could be bitten on the ass by what would constitute one of the best things to ever happen to them, and they wouldn't know it. Because they're locked in on what? To the exclusion of all else.


Then you have the irony of people who act this way, who are this way, and didn't have to be this way and don't have to be this way, complaining about a dearth of this and a dearth of that. I think, "How can you not see?"


Of course I have a horse in this race because it affects me. On all levels of my life. And it really holds us back as a society, as a culture, as humans.


It's very strange to me how there are these people who seemingly exist to tear down in judgment; to tar others for the slightest things which are often non-things.


We just saw it with the election and these grand, sweeping summaries about the whole of a person's character and morals based on if they didn't vote for whom that other person voted.


Do these people not realize that if they knew anyone better--or they met the people they all but worship from afar--that they'd have who knows how many things they'd hate about them going by how prescriptively closed minded they are?


Or do they think that every box they'd want to see checked a certain way would be so? Which is an absurd notion.


I don't think they think about any of this. It's like it isn't in the programming. That's not something that machine can do, unless you installed other software.



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